<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Burning up by louis_pip</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28935660">Burning up</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/louis_pip/pseuds/louis_pip'>louis_pip</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Akaashi Keiji-centric, Bokuto Koutarou &amp; Kuroo Tetsurou are Bros, Bokuto Koutarou Being Bokuto Koutarou, Coming Out, Gender Dysphoria, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, Internalized Homophobia, Kozume Kenma &amp; Kuroo Tetsurou Friendship, M/M, Minor Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi, Miya Atsumu is a Little Shit, Pain Kink, Protective Tsukishima Kei, Trans Akaashi Keiji, Trans Male Character, Yamaguchi Tadashi is a Good Friend</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 03:25:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,432</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28935660</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/louis_pip/pseuds/louis_pip</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Akaashi is deep in the closet when they first met. Bokuto grows attatched to him without knowing who he is. Then shit happens. Akaashi has to explain to Bokuto why the hell his tits keep shrinking and growing every few days.<br/>Another...can’t believe I have to use that word. But another Bokuto x Akaashi based on my past relationships...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Burning up</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Yes. He is this dorky and weird irl...that’s why i stick around him.<br/>Is it healthy to project onto a character this much? I don’t know. Anyway Akaashi has a pain kink...so tw I guess?<br/>Disclaimer! I own none of the characters, or songs or anything mentioned in this!!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Oh my god you look hot.” Akaashi blushed covering his stomach with his arms. “Not as cute as you.” His friend giggled and grabbed him by the hand. She led him over to where the others were sitting already inside. “Black suits you.” One of them said as he sat down slouching slightly in an attempt to make himself less visible. The girl across the table from him tapped his hand. “Hey, have you seen that meme. Bakugo has the same cup size as Mount Lady? That’s what you remind me of!” Akaashi smiled as she and the others cracked up. He sunk further down into his chair. He didn’t want to admit it to anyone, but he hated his body. He hated his hips; he hated his thighs he hated his whole figure. All people saw him for was his ass, thighs and tits. Nothing else. The night seemed to fly by and before he knew it, he was on the street walking his friend to her apartment. They were a block away when Akaashi noticed the sound of footsteps that had been there for a while become faster. He started to move faster as well talking loudly to the girl beside him. They were standing outside of the apartment door when someone yelled out to them.</p><p>He was tall, seemed like someone who’d be loud with weird hair. <em>Shit.</em> He thought but he said goodnight to his friend anyway walking towards the man. “Hey shorty.” Akaashi rolled his eyes. He didn’t even know this guy’s name and already he was getting on his nerves. “Hi.” He said simply and continued walking. “You’re cute for someone dressed like a dude.” Akaashi flipped him off and continued walking, he wasn’t in the mood to be called cute. He wasn’t in the mood to be hit on by this guy. He just wanted to get home, put on a hoodie, maybe get some drinking in, then pass out on the floor of his apartment. That’s all. “What’s your name!?” The man ran to catch up with him. “Akaashi Kaito. You?” The man looked confused. “Ah-ka-chi?” Akaashi huffed. “A-kaa-shi.” It looked like the other was processing. “Aghaashi!” Akaashi let out a snort. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. “Close enough.” He smiled down at him looking triumphant. “Bokuto Koutarou!” Akaashi nodded. They walked in silence until they got to a bar. “You knew around here?” Akaashi nodded. “Well, that explains why I haven’t seen you around before. You’d be pretty hard to miss looking like that.” Akaashi blushed slightly taking out his phone calling a taxi. “Thank you, Bokuto-san.” They stood in a comfortable silence until the taxi arrived.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>” Fancy seeing you here!” Akaashi looked up from his book and coffee to see the familiar owl-like man. He walked over to him. “Mind if I sit?” Akaashi shook his head. Now. He thought that Bokuto might sit...I don’t know on the other side of the booth. But no. No of course not he sat right next to him. “B-Bokuto-san what are you doing?” Bokuto tilted his head silently questioning what he did wrong. Akaashi realised just how much of a dork this boy was. “Sitting next to you! I never really asked what kinda stuff you’re into?” Akaashi froze. Shit. Did he want to say something normal like flower arranging or cooking? It was probably the safer rout considering the circumstances that they had met in. “M-manga, writing, punk music.” Sometimes he hated his own bluntness. “Holy shit me too! Genre?” Akaashi was surprised that he had reacted so well. “Shounen...” It probably seemed weird since he wasn’t exactly what you’d call a normal ma-. “I’ve never met a girl who likes Shounen who didn’t run away instantly! Finally! I’ve been reading this one called Bleach it’s really good but also kinda complicated...d-do you want to hear about it.”<br/>Akaashi smiled and nodded. The way Bokuto’s eyes lit up when he was talking and explaining. The way his eyebrows would furrow every time he forgot a detail and tried to remember it. The way he had just accepted what he had said without calling him weird...or questioning further...or sexualising him. It gave him some hope. Maybe he wouldn’t be like the others. He sat and listened for what felt like hours and he felt as if he could listen for hours more. “And now he’s a hollow.” Akaashi nodded smiling at him. He seemed relieved to get all of that out. “Jeez. No one’s ever sat through that before and y’know. Listened without calling me annoying!” Akaashi laughed. “Well, I’m here if you need it Bokuto-san. I actually enjoyed it a bit.” Bokuto’s eyes lit up as he smiled again.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>“Hey hey hey!” Akaashi was walking behind Bokuto with Tsukishima. He had told him that he had some friends he wanted him to meet. Akaashi had decided to bring Tsukishima along with him just in case something happened. He was the only one he’d actually come out to yet. The only one he knew for sure would accept him. A tall man with dark messy hair walked up to Bokuto returning his greeting. He slung an arm over the owl boys shoulder staring at the two of them. “And who’s this lovely couple?” Tsukishima took a small step away from him. Akaashi rolled his eyes. “Not much of a talker are ya? Well, I’m guessing that you’re Akaashi <em>Kaito</em>. And you’re the third wheel?” Tsukishima smiled. “And I’m guessing that you’ve lost your hairbrush.” Kuroo froze. “Okay yeah.” The two of them laughed for a second.<br/>Another smaller human walked up behind them tapping on Kuroo’s shoulder. “Y’all look fine here I’m out.” With that they walked down the street disappearing around a corner. “Is he...” Kuroo nodded. “He’ll be right.”</p><p>“Anyway! I’m Kuroo Tetsuro, and that little blond that just walked away was Kozume Kenma.” Akaashi nodded. Bokuto and Kuroo talked with each other until they got to the door. Kuroo stopped and held the door open for them all. Akaashi walked through after the others. It was only then when Kuroo turned to him and whispered. “Is that you’re actual name?” Akaashi gulped. He understood. He had messy hair, he liked to wear masculine clothes, he didn’t have ‘normal’ interests. But it had taken this man under five minutes to pick it up. He shook his head. “Keiji.” Kuroo nodded and with that they joined the others at the table. “So skinny, what should I call you?” Tsukishima and Kuroo conversed across the table...if you could even call it that. More like insulting and undermining each other whilst flirting as if their lives depended on it. Akaashi smiled, his friend didn’t get out much. Maybe this would be good for him. “What we’re you and Kuroo talking about before?” Bokuto’s tone was low, almost predatory. “Nothing.” Bokuto’s eyes narrowed for a moment before opening up bright again. All of whatever was there before was...gone.<br/><br/>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>“Akaaashi!” He tensed up. Of all times why did he have to run into him now. He rolled his eyes before turning around. “Bokuto-san.” His friends looked at each other, who the hell is this guy? “So, you do have friends! I didn’t think someone as quiet as you would ever find anyone!” He smiled turning back to the other girls. “Oh, come on darling, why so serious?” His head shot back around. “What’s wrong ‘kaashi are ya sc-” He stopped mid-sentence. “Oh...I’ll see ya later then!” They watched the tall owl guy walk away followed by a small red head and another tall guy. Akaashi turned back to the group. “When did you get a boyfriend?” Akaashi shook his head. “What’s his name?” He opened his mouth to speak. “Wait I recognise him! Bokuto or something like that right? My sister’s friends brother knows him.” Akaashi nodded slightly scared. “Wait was that the guy who followed us home?” Akaashi nodded a blush rising in his cheeks. “Damn...” she wiggled an eyebrow. Akaashi’s eyes widened. “It’s not like that!” They nodded in unison eyebrows raised. “He’s just a friend. Okay?” One of them patted him on the back. “Sure...whatever you say <em>darling.</em>”</p><p>“Ha! What are the chances seeing you here?” Akaashi just wanted to get home with the groceries. Was that too much to ask? “Slim Bokuto, very slim.” He decided to put the bags down, this would take a while. “Why’d you cut your hair?” Akaashi rolled his eyes. “I just felt like it.” Up to that point he had long curly hair. Too long for his liking. It just got tangled, hot, and the dysphoria was overwhelming. “Come on, with you there’s always a reason!” He sighed. This guy was an idiot, but he knew him well. “I was sick of brushing it.” Bokuto smiled. “Right! Well, I kinda like it. Makes you look even cuter than before, even if you do look more like a guy now.” Akaashi’s heart beat faster. He thought he looked like a guy; he might be closer to passing...but this was Bokuto. “R-really?” Bokuto nodded. “Would I lie to you my love?” Akaashi gave him an, are you serious, look. “I’m serious.” Fuckin mind reader! “Thank you, Bokuto-san.” The older rolled his eyes. “Relax ‘kaashi, just call me Bokuto none of that formal shit.” He nodded. “Welp. I’ve gotta get home before Sakusa kills me.” He started walking. Akaashi picked up the bags and continued on his way too. “Oh! And Akaashi! When you wanna tell me what’s actually going on, I’m here!” Akaashi smiled to himself. “Aight!”</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>sorry in advance to Miya Atsumu stans...</p><p><br/>Why did he listen to him? “So! This is the chick you were telling me about?” Bokuto nodded. “Miya, Akaashi. Akaashi, Miya.” Akaashi waved timidly. “Thought you said she had long hair.” He leaned down to examine his features. “Not much of a face, but she’s got a nice rack.” Bokuto gave him a death glare. “Bro. This is my friend. She’s like, an intelligent being.” Atsumu rolled his eyes. Akaashi crossed his arms over his stomach. “Yeah, but she’s a girl as well.” Bokuto placed a hand on the small man’s shoulder. “You’d be surprised. She’s into writing, and comics! She’s an intern at like a writing place or something right ‘kaashi?” Akaashi faced the ground nodding. He’d graduated a year ago. “You have really weird taste Bo.” Akaashi took the jacket he had tied around his waist slowly slipping it on. “I take it back.” Akaashi rolled his eyes. “Shut up Miya.” He stood slightly in front of Akaashi blocking Atsumu’s view. “She’d probably have more luck with girls than you ever will.” Atsumu laughed at Bokuto’s comment. “Really?” Bokuto nodded. Akaashi just stood there confused by the whole situation.</p><p> “Why don’t I try to seduce her then?” The owl guy smiled back at Akaashi who smirked at him in return. “I’d like to see you try.” He moved to one side. “You’re eyes. They’re like blueberries. And your hair reminds me of...coal from a fire.” Akaashi didn’t know how he was supposed to react...so he just laughed. “Come on mate, you’re gonna have to come up with something better than that.” Atsumu turned to Bokuto. “Shut up!” He went back to Akaashi. “You look like a cute dog in that hoodie...thing...and you have a nice neck.” The fuck? “Miya....I’ll stop you there. It’s kinda hard to talk someone up who doesn’t lean in your direction.” His eyes widened, Bokuto’s eyes widened. “What? He’s not exactly my type...” He heard Bokuto exhale. “Miya, dear. Grow a pair. Don’t treat us like objects. And fix your attitude. You’ll have more luck that way.” With that he zipped up the hoodie and walked away. “Jeez... is she on her period or something?” He resisted the urge to turn around again when he heard the sound of a hand slapping the back of a head.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>“Shit.” He leaned back against the door of his apartment. Finally, he was home. Tears threatened his waterline, he couldn’t take it anymore. His ribs and stomach ached more than ever. He couldn’t risk using the female restrooms on days like this. Too much of a risk. Why wasn’t he just born male? It would he’s been so much easier. He decided that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if he just gave into the pain and took a god damn painkiller. Then came the tears, why was he so weak? Taking the painkillers would make him weak, but putting up with the pain would make him strong. As he stood there contemplating it there was a knock at the door. Roommate probably forgot her keys again...he was still in his work clothes...he threw on a hoodie and opened the door. “Kaashi?” He wiped his eyes nodding. Bokuto pushed through closing the door behind him. He placed his hands on his shoulders. “I thought I recognised you...but I didn’t know because you looked different...and sad. Are you okay?” Akaashi nodded. Bokuto examined his face. “You’re hurt.” Akaashi shook his head.</p><p>“Why were you crying then?” Akaashi pushed his hand from his shoulder. “You don’t want to know.” Bokuto removed his other hand. “Kaito...” Akaashi looked up to face him. “You trust me, right?” He nodded. “I won’t judge you.” He tensed up. “You sure?” Bokuto nodded. Akaashi unzipped the jumper not looking up to face him. “Wait, you’re not...what?” Akaashi undid the first three buttons of his shirt. “It’s tight, so my chest is flat.” Bokuto stared for a moment. “Doesn’t it hurt?” Akaashi nodded. “Can you breathe?” Akaashi nodded. “Wait...why would you want a flat chest?” He started to do his buttons up again. “I’m not what you’d call cis.” He still looked confused. “Bokuto, I was born a girl physically. But I’m not one mentally. It’s like a male brain in a female body.” Bokuto opened his mouth but nothing came out. A minute passed. “So, you were born in the wrong body?” Akaashi nodded. “Should I call you something else?” He smiled. “Keiji, call me Keiji.” Bokuto nodded. “Alright then Keiji.” Akaashi wiped the tears that threatened to roll down his face. “If anyone comes for you, I’m here to help! Now let’s get some pain killers into you, and you should get into something comfortable, don’t think that I don’t know things.”</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>“Y’know what’s weird Keiji? I’m straight... but I think about you...like I would about a female.” Akaashi rolled his eyes. He was used to Bokuto and his strange way of flirting, but this was new. “What do you mean by that?” Bokuto shifted in his seat, he looked kinda embarrassed. “Well... what I mean is that I’ve thought about fucking you...but you’re a guy...Y’know what don’t worry about it!” Akaashi was silent, he took a sip of coffee. “A-are you gonna say something?” He shook his head. “Keiji! Don’t just leave me like this! What do you think?!” Akaashi shrugged. “You’re nice...but as you said you’re straight. You deserve better than some scrawny, pan, trans guy like me.” Bokuto looked like he was having a stroke. “Akaaashi I’m confused. I talked to Kuroo...he doesn’t know...I talked to Miya...” Akaashi chuckled. “Miya? Really?” Bokuto rolled his eyes. “I was desperate okay!” Akaashi nodded.</p><p>“It’s just...when we met you were cute, but now you’re cuter...and it confuses the hell out of me.” Akaashi nodded happy to listed to Bokuto work through his sexuality crisis. “What do you do? When shit like this happens? Wait...I- FUCK.” He slammed his head into the table. “You good Bo?” He shook his head. “Keiji, people think we’re dating. What do we do about that?” He patted the back of Bokuto’s head. “Just let them imagine. If they think we’re together, let them! They don’t have to know shit.” Bokuto raised his head. “When did you start talking and swearing above the level of a whisper? You sound like a guy!” He raised an eyebrow. “See that’s the problem! No matter how you look at it or listen to it I’m stuck, and j-th-gah!” Akaashi giggled watching Bokuto melt down. “You understand what I’m trying to tell you right?” He nodded. They weren’t really in the friend zone anymore...but they weren’t dating either.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>Once again, they had ended up sitting together again outside of the local library, something that they hadn’t expected was each other’s taste in music. Practically identical...except Bokuto’s idea of heavy was Slipknot. Still, they’d do this every once in a while. Listen to music together whilst reading books in the shade of the large concrete structure. “You like Panic At The Disco, right?” Akaashi nodded. He smiled down at him and scrolled through the playlists until he let out a triumphant snort. “I’ve never heard you sing.” Akaashi slammed shut his book and turned to him. “Koutarou.” Bokuto hummed along to the music. “Come on your voice is nice when you speak.” The older man started to sing along to the music, he got to the chorus. “Come on Keiji! Sing for me.” He opened his mouth to protest but nothing came out. He hated his voice. It was high and soft. So, fucking feminine...he also hated the face he associated with it.</p><p>He had broken his heart two years before...he cheated on him. He had walked in on him with a girl, one of the girls he actually considered a friend. Sure, the boy left that school as fast as he could because...well in his words...Akaashi was a bat shit crazy bitch...but he still thought about it every now and again. Whenever he went to sing no noise could come out.</p><p>“Keiji, I’ve heard you before.” His eyes widened. “And I sound like a cat in a washing machine.” Bokuto face palmed. “Darling, I know you were a theatre kid, you memorise words as if it’s the same as breathing. You can’t tell me that you sound like shit.” He sighed. With that he opened his mouth. By the end of the third song Akaashi had to get home...and change before his roommate got home. “Y’know we’d be happy to let you hang around with us if you wanted to.” Akaashi shook his head. “It’s alright.” If he was being honest Bokuto’s friends scared him...he didn’t have a problem with any of them personally it was just the fact that they were all tall as hell...and he wasn’t exactly reaching the top shelf.</p><p>(a/n. I was fucking bawling writing this last part. All I could picture was his face when we were told to sing with each other. And before this other guy said something, I didn’t sing... for months.)</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>“Hey four eyes!” Akaashi, Tsukishima, and Yamaguchi were sitting together in a cafe when another group walked in. Tsukishima and Akaashi turned to see who it was. “Hey asshole!” Tsukishima had opened his mouth to answer...but immediately closed it. He stared at Akaashi...did he just...he looked a Yamaguchi who looked equally as confused. He nodded. They turned to see Bokuto laughing, Kuroo nervously looking between the two of them. Kenma just smiled at Akaashi. “Oh, come on darling I know you love it.” Kuroo ushered him and Kenma to a table to try and break up the weird interaction. “In your dreams sicko.” He turned back to face the speechless Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. “What?” Tsukishima pinched the bridge of his nose. “I thought you two weren’t talking after what happened.” Akaashi looked down at his wrist. “He’s changed. I wouldn’t get into something with him again if he didn’t.” Yamaguchi looked at him with a doubtful expression. “Yeah...but you said that when he pinned you to a wall by the neck and said that he could kill you if he wanted to.” Tsukishima snorted.</p><p>He was the only one who knew about his...kinks. “Akaashi. I get that you’re alright with that kind of shit. But we’re worried.” Yamaguchi glanced at Tsukishima questioning his words for a moment. “It was just one bone. Not that bad, I’m not dead in a ditch somewhere, he isn’t abusing me, and he respects my boundaries. He’s not that bad.” They continued to question him...but all Akaashi could hear was the conversation Bokuto was having. He smiled...he was glad that he met the owl boy.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>